STRESS MANAGEMENT DIET


    The following diet is designed specifically to help you manage 
    stress, which tends to build up during the day.

    There are also certain rules with which you should become familiar
    as they are very important to the proper implementation of the diet.


    BREAKFAST
    1/2   Grapefruit.
    1     Slice of whole wheat toast.
    5 oz  Skim Milk.


    LUNCH
    4 oz   Lean Broiled Chicken Breast.
    1 cup  Steamed Spinach.
    1 cup  Herbal Tea.
    1 ea   Oreo Cookie.


    MID-AFTERNOON SNACK
    The rest of the Oreos in the package.
    2   Pints of Rocky Road ice cream.
    1   Jar of Hot Fudge Sauce.
        Nuts, Cherries, Whipped Cream.


    SUPPER
    2  Loaves of garlic bread with cheese.
    1  Large sausage, mushroom and cheese pizza.
    4  Cans of beer (or 1 large pitcher of draft).
    3  Milky Way and/or Snickers candy bars.


    LATE EVENING NEWS SNACK
    1  Frozen cheesecake eaten directly from the freezer!


                        RULES FOR DIET UNDER STRESS

          1.  If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has 
    no calories.

          2.  If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories 
    in the candy bar are canceled by the diet soda.  This is medically 
    called the "Liquifaction Process."

          3.  When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if 
    you don't eat as much as they do.  This is called "Caloric 
    Cancellation by Reciprocity."

          4.  Food eaten for medical purposes NEVER  counts, such as
    toast, brandy, hot chocolate, or Sara Lee Cheesecake.

          5.  Cookie pieces contain no calories.  The process of 
    breaking cookies causes caloric leakage.  The same principle holds 
    as well for other foods.  Hence, instead of eating a chocolate 
    pie whole, if you eat it in pieces, you intake less calories.

          6.  Movie related foods have no additional calories because 
    they are part of the entire entertainment package, and not of 
    one's own personal fuel.

          7.  Foods that have the same color have the same number of
    calories.  Examples are: Spinach and pistachio ice cream.
                             Mushrooms and white chocolate.

          Note:  Chocolate is a universal and may be substituted for any
    other food color.  This principle's biological name is: "Caloric
    Equilibrium by Chromasynthesis."

    Final Thought:  Remember, "STRESSED" spelled backwards is "DESSERTS!"